Monday, October 1, 2012

Initial suffering continues

Wow - this sure is affecting me far more than I thought it would.  The nausea has eased somewhat so that I am no longer throwing up (thank goodness), but I have zero appetite (which I suppose is the whole point).  I don't feel any happier, and have sore muscles on shoulders and definitely my neck.  Tired is an understatement - I am sooooo tired.  Yesterday we drove to my sister's and I slept the entire way (2.5 hour drive) and I then slept the entire way home again.  Then today I felt way too tired to get out of bed - I couldn't even lift my arms.  So I stayed in bed nearly the entire day.  At 2pm I asked my husband to help me get up - he told me to sleep more!  So about 3.30pm I finally got up.  Now at 7:30pm I am ready to go back to bed again.  I have never been this tired.   I also have the worst mouth ulcers I have ever had in my entire life.  I can't even talk properly with them.

So I need to get my life back on track.  Not just for the weight loss, which I so desperately need but also because dishes are piling up in the kitchen and my family has had pizza for two nights running.  Somehow I need to get past these initial side effects and back on the track that I need to get onto.

I hope it is soon. 

Friday, September 28, 2012

My first day

I didn't sleep very well last night - I woke several times and really didn't feel refreshed at all.  I had to get up to go to work, but on rising I had stomach pains and diarrhea, and was very nauseous.  In the shower I dry retched several times and my throat was quite sore afterwards.

That all seemed to settle down, and I was able to go to work.  Apart from feeling quite nauseous most of the day I got more tired as the day progressed and I found myself microsleeping several times.  I have no idea if anyone else at the office noticed.  Once I woke up with several "dddddddddddddddddd " filling the page.

My appetite was totally gone and i tried drinking black tea and didn't even get through half a cup before I went and threw it out.  Next I tried a coffee but hardly had any of that at all.  I stuck to water for the rest of the day, and had a small vegetable lunch.

Luckily by the time I went home I was feeling a little better and I didn't even come close to microsleeping when I was driving - thank goodness.

It will be interesting to see how I go over the next few days.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

The first step of this journey

Over the years I have tried pretty much every diet out there - I have done sureslim, weight watchers, sacred heart soup diet, liver cleansing diet, and so many many more.  I have seen dieticians, and worked hard with friends to review what they do differently.  Each attempt has the same result.  I don't lose weight!  I don't put it on, but I barely lose any, if I indeed do lose any.

I thought it was me, that I was copping out.  I exercised, measured calories, cut out soft drinks, chocolate and so much more.  It never dropped.  Weightloss websites helped me track exactly what I ate and drank and what exercise I did, and they were forever telling me off for not eating all my calories etc.  Dieticians reviewed my food diaries and could hardly ever make any suggestions on what else I could do.

So finally being referred to a specialist and meeting my doctor was a total breath of fresh air.  She understood.  She told me that I fit all the criteria for having metabolic syndrome.  After googling it - i feel like I am reading a bio of myself.  Here is just one link I found Metabolic Syndrome.

So my doctor gave me some sobering facts.  My BMI was 50.  Classified as Morbidly Obese.  I gotta do something and I have to do it Now!  I'm 41 and I have a 5 year old son at home who needs his mother.

After our discussion, she has recommended for me that I immediately start taking Cymbalta (an antidepressant) - she has had good results with using this combined with good diet and exercise.  She also wants me to make her bircher muesli recipe, and eat it for breakfast and lunch every day and have a small piece of meat nad 4 cups of veggies for dinner.  

She also wants to see me again in 6 weeks and for me to consider in the future either gastric sleeving or gastric bypass.  I've started researching both these options and I have to say, they scare the crap right out of me (if only they scared a few kgs of fat out of me too I might be happy).

Actually, even starting the antidepressant scares me.  However, I need to be around for my son.  I love him beyond reason and he needs his mum.

So today I took my first tablet.  And thus this journey begins..............